Depression is a symptom.

My new theory!

No depression is not caused by being unable to achieve goals.
No depression is not caused by not getting the recognition you deserve.
No depression is not caused by past hurts.

But all these are valid reasons for feeling depressed.

How does one make a normal person depressed? or when does a normal person become depressed?

A person locked up in a small cell with no windows, is bound to eventually  become depressed, no matter how perky their personality.  Many people with chronic debilitating illnesses  become depressed. A starving person is unable to do anything in their weakened state, they display classical symptoms of depression, but they are not incorrectly diagnosed as depressed but rather as staving.

The reason people get depressed  is that they are robbed of their freedom, they are unable to do what they want to do. They are physically unable to express their creativity.

My theory is that this inhibitance is the cause for most depression. Most depressed people are trapped in a cage in a sense, they then often feel they are worthlessness, which is a legitimate and valid conclusion, if I go one step further they may feel nothing as even emotion is robbed from them.

I hope it should be very clear that telling the depressed person to cheer up is just making things worse as they are still in that cage. One could give the depressed person medication to alter their legitimate feelings, this would probably make it much more bearable to the person, but it still only covers up the symptom. Continue reading ‘Depression is a symptom.’ »

WonderMom?

Pregnancy can be very tiring in the beginning and I am sure again at the end. After a bit of a long trip to drop someone off at the airport (it was raining buckets) I got home and wanted to sleep. Eventually got to bed at 20.30 and was woken not even 2 hours later by a Little boy who was not a happy camper. Rolling on the bed. Tummy sore. Mom trying to keep her eyes open.

Eventually I put him in bed with us! What happens? The obvious of course…he throws up on the bed…Lovely. Got him cleaned up. He moaned a bit…gave him some meds. He goes to sleep…

Unfortunately being awake started up the heartburn again. I really didnt know I would suffer so early in the pregnancy. I laid awake. Tossed and turned and eventually fell asleep…

Only to be awoken  by a unhappy boy again. This is 4am! Took him to toilet. I could smell something was coming. NOTHING HAPPENS.
Off to bed agan…Little Boy sits up, and has a very runny poo in the underpants…thankfully not on my bed. But I rush to toilet and we clean up and blah blah. Unfortunately by this time Little Boy is very awake. So again so is mommy and the heartburn. Sometime after 6 and a few more toilet trips we are back in bed and Little boy…with some meds and love is asleep.

Mommy is not! Heartburn is not! Cats are hungry, bird is whistling (wishing he had a tune) and I suppose my day has started

The Journey continues…

For a while I have had suspicions that I might be pregnant again. So I eventually took the test and went for bloods. Yip I am. Been to the doctor recently and Baby’s heart is beating!

Next Visit is on the 8th.

Activities we did this week

Monday - a trip to the library. We took out two books on airplanes. We read and reread them

Tuesday - a trip to the airport to say goodbye to Gerry, Sue and Aiden. A perfect opportunity to go watch planes take off and land. Elijah thoroughly enjoyed himself and didn’t want to leave. We were all exhausted after the walk through the airport.

Wednesday - creative play at Mom/Kids group. Jelly, custard and coloured pasta. Landed up jumping,running and just having fun (not too many fights)

Thursday - swimming, and tent/tunnel made up of double folding mattress. Painting and riding our motorbike.

Changes happen sometimes when we would rather it didn’t!

Three weeks ago, Elijah lost his dummy, we were potty training at the time too.

I had a broken dummy packed away, and when He asks for it I give him the broken one and for some unknown reason he thinks Nonna the cat broke it. Every now and then when he thinks of it and if she is around she gets a smack. (We all have to make sacrifices in these difficult times- even the cat)

The potty training went well except he got a infection and was on antibiotics but otherwise it went much easier than I had anticipated.

The problem with the dummy is that Elijah used it to go to sleep. Now that there is no dummy around (except me of course) Elijah has decided that naps are also a No-go. So we suffer through the day and have early bedtimes 7-8pm. And Mom is soooo tired I go right to sleep too.

Swimming lessons are suffering as well.  Elijah is at a stage where to move ahead he needs to kick more often. Unfortunately he doesn’t like to kick under water - he is a FLOATER. He is normally so relaxed he will float around the pool and be comfortable while doing it usually. The teacher has been trying new things to get him to kick and it has put him off swimming and he just wants to play. Today the teacher said that she will just give him a bit of emotional support for the next few lessons and see how it goes. Not sure exactly what that entails but will see.

Homeschool Update -Week 20/10/2008

I have been terribly busy trying to get started and to keep up.

This week the book I am reading to Elijah is A Treasury of Children’s Literature

Our theme for this week is the Farm! The animals, their sounds, what grows on the farm, who lives there. I am trying to put together a lapbook with Elijah but it is a bit difficult because his attention span is very limited. We managed a paste activity for10 minutes as well today. Pasting different pieces to make a barn/farmyard. We are not quite finished yet, but will try to finish tomorrow.

Elijah is definitely very busy. Not sure if it is the heat or just the energy Summer seams to bring him or is he just naturally inquisitive.

We are also matching colours/shapes. I made ten shapes, each with a different colour and we play a game of “Mommy has a red oval, where is his friend” mix and match type thing.

Our Journey ended for now

On the 2nd September, at our cell group, God challenged me. I was worshiping to the words: “I love you, I need you, Even if my world falls, I will never let You go…”He asked me “will you really”… I answered “yes”.

On Thursday night the 4th, I started with a brown dischage. We prayed and by Friday it had stopped. On Friday late afternoon i started bleeding a bit. At 9pm I went to sleep still praying. At 9.24pm I woke up and things had gone badly.

Went to hospital by 11. They admitted me and had to do a “uterus evacuation” at 2am because i was losing too much blood. A bit more than normal apparently.

So we are praising God and waiting for the next journey to begin. Not really questioning anything because i think some things just don’t need to be answered in this life.So we will wait for the Hereafter for answers.

“You therefore, my child, be strengthened in the grace that is in Christ Jesus.” 2 Timothy 2:1 (web)

Our 2nd Pregnancy Journey

We have been trying to fall pregnant since Elijah was 3 months old. He is now over 2. In March/April I was on Clomid for one month. We didn’t continue because William got that we would need to wait for our Isaac. To us that meant we had to wait for A SPECIFIC baby God wanted to bless us with else I would fall pregnant, just not that specific baby . So we waited, knowing with peace that God would bless us.

“the above paragraph has been edited regarding some wording”

On the 7th of July, In my quite time, I got a Verse in Mark 9v23 “Everything is possible, to Him who believes”. Little did I know what those words would mean to me today.

On the 9th of July I had a recurring dream that filled me with Hope. My dream was of a baby was kicking me and told me: “I am here, you just don’t know about me yet!” I went back to sleep and would dream the same dream again and again. The next morning I told William. He was very positive. I made a trip to the pharmacy and bought a home pregnancy test, which turned positive. I had a blood test just to make sure. We were pregnant.

At my ultrasound scan at 6-7 weeks, the Doctor could not see the baby or heartbeat.  I just wanted to get out of his office and he wanted to “console” me and give me drugs for stress. When I got in my car I told God I would not accept this. But I think over the next 10 days I slowly did. William felt our “Isaac” was on the alter, just as Abraham had done, in the biblical days”, so we were ready to accept what happened at our next doctor’s visit (A Better Doctor), The same thing happened. A blighted Ovum/anembryonic pregnancy. We were booked in to go for a Uterus Evacuation (D&C) Today the 18th August. I would be 9 weeks Fetal age. So compare to a normal pregnancy I would be 11 Weeks. We accepted it but were filled with Hope that God had a bigger plan. William prayed that God would put a spanner in the works for us before Monday if it was not His will.

At Church yesterday we were quite accepting of the fact we were destroying whatever was in my womb. I had Hope God would bless us again and everything would be fine.There is a lady prophet that blessed us before we were pregnant with Elijah. She was there yesterday. When i told her what we were doing, she told us the baby is hiding. We needed to give God time for a miracle. We told her we were unsure and would go home and pray and would give her a call later that day.

At home we prayed that God would give us clarity and understanding. I got scripture in Genesis 18. The Angels came to Abraham’s tent and told him Sarah would have a baby. She laughed and the Lord/Angel told Abraham that they would pass them again in a year and she would have a child. We prayed and both felt the need to wait for God and not do things on our own.

We called the hospital to cancel the surgery, our Pastor to submit our plans to Him. He was in agreement. And we called the Lady. She was very glad we had made the decision.  If it was any other person to intercede in our plans, we probably would not have listened. But we did submit and are going to the Lady’s house tonight for more prayer and clarity. This morning William was reminded of the Angel that stopped Abraham from sacrificing Isaac at the last minute. William feels Frieda is our Angel, who stopped us from destroying the baby.

There are no medical complications in waiting. If my body miscarries at least I know it wasn’t my decision but a decision from Above. This journey is definitely a test of our Faith and believing that God can do anything for Him who Believes.

We will be diligently praying and meditating and I know that whatever the outcome it will be a journey I will never forget.

There is a website dedicated to Misdiagnosed Miscarriages. There are hundreds of woman that didn’t destroy their chances of having their babies and a few weeks later their babies were seen on sonar with heartbeats and born perfectly.This is also reassuring.

I do believe that my baby is just hiding. Medical Science, although important to us in this day and age, is nothing compared to the power of the God I serve and love.

Operating Systems: The Prediction…

The distant future the distribution of Operating Systems will be as follows …

Servers:

  • 70% Linux
  • 15% Windows
  • 15% Other

Desktop:

  • 60% (up to 75%) Apple Mac
  • 20% Linux
  • 20% Windows (unless Microsoft does something drastic in Windows 7)

Embedded: (phones, fridges and other fun electronic gadgets):

  • 80% Linux
  • 10% Windows
  • 10% Others (including Symbian OS)

Biggest loser: Microsoft

Biggest winner: Apple

Time will tell.

Activities we are enjoying

I bought some lacing cards. I really love these…i think it is a real challenge as a skill to learn. I bought four: Animals and you lace a shoestring through the holes. I think this is something you can buy from Smile although i am not sure.

I am having so much fun with the tempera paints, painting with brushes finger-painting, with straws and potatoes, and even hands and feet stuff….It is a bit messy but this paint washes out easily and dries really well and with DEEP colours. A lot of paints you buy at the store are very dull and almost not there

This week my focus is on Noah’s Ark…I have fourNoah songs that we love to sing and make music to…

I also wish i could find some really nice stickers…i am getting bored of disney!